Impending problems...the SHIPS we face in our daily lives~

Have you ever wondered how the human mind actually starts working and thinking of the many different responses that we actually hope for or anticipate from another?
Such is what i would be ranting on this post today... which is the many "ships" that we get on, off or ultimate sink with in our lives.

I always marveled how the ships of those days manage to brave those seas to reach the other side of the sea, a feat that may take weeks or months on end...
I mean, look at it, its all wood, fragile, one wave of uncertainty and it perishes at the hands of mother nature of simply crash into the rocks unseen beneath the serene waters which betray the danger lurking beneath it.
So, what ships you ask?
Well among them would be FRIENDship, RELATIONship, KINship and the list goes on (frankly these are the only one popping up in my head as of now XD)

KINship is a very broad context and thus for me it mostly reflects a sense of belonging, something akin to family.
It could be absolute as having only one mother or father, to as loose as having adopted siblings and foster parents.

They are as important as ever as they are with you when you grow up, maybe not all the way, but nevertheless they are part of your life, a fact that none can deny no matter how hard you try.
They are a part of your life tapestry which starts weaving when you are born into this world, a pattern that registers no matter what your deed or what you choose to do..
A beacon that shines out and looks out after you no matter what your problems are...
Guiding, slowly showing the way~
They may be imprecise and imperfect at times but hey, they'll be there...

FRIENDship, literally we attend to a fleet of them in our daily lives.
From a small tug boat, up to the size of an cargoship, maybe even ships that dwarfs the Titanic (no bigger comparison XD)
And still, the waters that these ship sail on are treacherous and unpredictable.
So which "ship" among the FRIENDships available to us give us safety?
Which one is to say would grant us understanding of those dangerous waters?
Which one would bail us out should we end up floating in the endless ocean?

Most of the time the ships sail where they want to sail, how can I blame them for that?
Each has their own path to adhere to, but is it too much to ask to consider other ships passing though or to help a man overboard in the wild sea?
Is it too much to ask to understand the dilemma of requesting a ship that suits your every needs or taking advantage of a ship that has graciously allowed a person on board?

Sometimes things get so rough that most boats would turn around.
I guess what I mean to say is, those that matters are those FRIENDships that go with you all the way, even when facing rough stormy seas..

RELATIONship, a ship never thought of until recently...
What would one look for in such a ship?
Comfort?
Trust?
Relief?
Desires?
Confidante?
One thing that is clear to me is that such a ship would be one that has gone through a lot to keep us above the waves, with such gentleness that we are able to go through a lightning storm even with a mortal fear of lightning which would normally curb us from doing so...
How strong such a ship is on facing the stormy seas ahead, it is a fragile ship nevertheless which fails at the smallest provocation or misunderstanding.
Thus, the ship is only as strong as the nails of "trust" that holds the ship together...
How about that?

Most of the time we aren't lucky enough to see or meet such great ships in our lives.
I only hope that I am able to find those ships that are special to me, that really mean something, and cherish them.
Hopefully I'm not blind enough to recognize, but experiences with past ships have made me wary... too wary...

Fai fai No-Reason's weather forecast today:
There seem to be a star shining now, giving the storm a hopeful sight.
A sight that I seem to cherish and have hopes on.
Do I even deserve such simple hopes and happiness?
Picking up my umbrella, I thread on in this light drizzle~

Piece~

Looking up

The rain seems to be a little lighter now with the small rays of light that seem to escape the dreaded clouds

Small outings with two old understanding friends, just empty talking and eating...

A totally random trip to Mcdonalds for breakfast to cheer ourselves up (with a truthful friend) ...

Getting news at 1.45am in the morning that hospital on call session 8am-12pm is postponed to another day...

Priceless~

Fai fai No-Reason's weather forecast today:

The heavy clouds in the distance seem to space out now, and ray of intermittent light shines down on us.
Such simple light and warm sight of kind act seem to warm me from inside.
It seems that I was in need of such simple things from time to time to keep me going~

Piece~

Neglected and thrown aside

What can I say? 

The title speaks all~
Its only human nature to go find someone when u need something from that person...
When you have finished your business with him/her, you just leave and life goes on...
Too well apparently~
I stand on my own two feet, proud that I have made it this far without so called "support of friends", as only a handful these days can be considered, and even then they are trickling away.
No point holding on to things that won't stay with you, or for you for that matter...

I guess that's the reason I'd rather do anything and everything myself.
There is no need to bring another person into the picture and bother him/her...

So called "socialite" and yet the feeling of awkwardness and out of place when a gathering exceeds 5 individuals.
They say people have a natural predisposition to WANT TO BELONG, either to a group of friends or as a special someone to that someone special.
and yet to "belong", they discard others along the way~
pathetic~

Staying alone is a good thing I guess, and yet a part of me is just curious on actually how many people would try and find me out of the blue~
Seems that I am not of significant importance to anyone lately, which should be a good thing.
and yet some small part of me is nagging at me, proving it to me that people come and go, and they only find others when they need to...

I cast this disappointment into the sky, and as predictable as Earth's gravity is, it falls back onto me and hits me on the head...

Fai fai No-Reason's weather forecast today:
The clouds seem to drift ever so closer, and although they still remain in a distance, the wind carries the smell of rain and a mild drizzle, a testament to what is to come...
The wind has blown my umbrella to the ground and with numb hands I try to reach for it.
and yet I just stand still in the mild drizzle, noticing there is none to hold an umbrella over me~

Piece~

Things happening all around me~

 

Dat me?

hahahaha~ Yesh it is, pink shirt, aimst lab coat and all O.o
Being "on-call" at the hospital used to be all mysterious and exciting at the beginning of last year...
This year, everyone trembles in fear when they are announced to be on-call as such sessions usually take place barely 2-3 hours after normal classes end at 5pm.

Been randomly taking to a friend withing the last few days about life experiences that I seem to be lacking of.. (yes yes I admit sofi, if ur reading this lol)
It seems that I am loosing out much by not letting anyone know anything more than they do need to know.
By doing so apparently I am shielding off other people and chances of ever getting to know them better.

Lol if only such a statement is true...
But people are driven by the need  to protect themselves from threats, no matter how petty it may be.
Sadly there are just too many things to protect myself from.
Friends do come and go, even good friends...
Only difference is that good friends may not always be there, but you can always count on them to pull you up on your feet even at the worst of times.
That was the impression I seem to take note recently.
Let's just monitor and see if that's true~

Recently there has been another friend who has been asking how I manage to talk back to people (arguing, what not, proving a point) without getting angry yourself or making the other party angry?
Now, I would like to say that it is simple enough.
Do you LIKE people smirking at you when you talk to them?
Do you LIKE people crossing their arms and being sarcastic to you?
Do you LIKE people belittling you?
Point being, if you respect others enough, they will come to like and respect you as well.
Being humble is not something that drives another person up the wall..
So is humility.
If only some higher ups in society can see that, the world will be a better place..
referring to SPECIFIC PEOPLE IN MY FACULTY WHO IS MAKING STUDENTS LOOK LIKE A FOOL AND BLAMING THEM FOR EVERY PROBLEM THE UNIVERSITY IS FACING...

Thus when I look at this, I just look back and smile before I start rebutting and defending myself...
Of course, in a polite way ^^ *curtsies*

Fai fai No-Reason's weather forecast today:
The looming storm seems ever so close, so close that I feel that I can stretch my arm out int o the clouds to let all that water trapped in the clouds out..
Everything around me seems bleak as I continue calling out to so called old and loyal friends.
Out of habit and ignorance, I am left alone here, waiting for the clouds to come ever closer.

Piece~